Main Effects
by NemesisFate
Summary: Fourth in Effects Series. Severus can't stop thinking about that potion and causes another... unexpected pregnancy. HPSS slash.


Title: Main Effects

Author: Nemesis

Feedback: Of course! post a comment or email me at HP/SS

Rating: PG-13

Summary: Sequel to "After Effects." Severus just can't stop thinking about that potion… Of course, he screws it up again. Now what?

"Sev, are you sure about this?" Harry asked with a deep feeling of trepidation. Severus' previous attempts hadn't been that successful. Six-month old Marc and Elena were proof enough of that.

"Sure I am. Are you doubting my abilities as a Potions Master?"

"Not at all, Sev, love. All I'm doubting is my safety."

Severus had created a new version of that bloody potion, this time for Harry to drink.

With a sigh of resignation, Harry downed the potion.

Five weeks later, he turned out to be correct. Not that he actually _cared_ at that moment. He was too busy screaming at Severus in the Infirmary.

"PREGNANT!" Harry shrieked.

Poppy nodded. "Afraid so."

"YOU FUCKING BASTARD, THAT BLOODY POTION HAD TO MAKE ME _PREGNANT!_"

Severus winced. He didn't mean to do that.

"Oh, shut up!" he snapped. "I've been through it and it wasn't so terrible."

Harry snorted. "Oh, right," he said viciously, oozing sarcasm. "That's why you were so bitchy for nine months."

"Um…" Poppy interrupted hesitantly. "You're not just pregnant. You're carrying quadruplets."

Severus and Harry stared at her. "_Quadruplets?_" Harry cried in shocked. "FOUR OF THEM!"

Severus cringed. Harry would be throwing hexes next, he was sure of it. "It's not enough that you make me bloody pregnant, you also have to ensure I'm carrying four kids. Well done, Severus. I'm out of here. I'll be by later, Poppy, for regular check-ups. Merlin knows I'll need the help."

He got up and swept out.

"Dear Merlin," Severus sighed. "Just what _have_ I done?"

Poppy glared pointedly at her friend. "A lot more than you'll ever know. If you thought carrying twins was bad, think about having four writhing around in your belly. It would be enough to teach you to bloody well stop fooling around with those damned potions of yours. What the hell were you trying to do anyway?"

Severus blushed and quickly told her the story.

Poppy rolled her eyes. "One of these days you'll see what everyone else in this castle already sees: that Harry loves you unconditionally. Although I'm not quite sure that'll hold true for the next nine months. He'll call you every name in the book and then some. Six kids in less than two years, Severus. You should be proud of yourself. Maybe you want to start a Quidditch team. Merlin knows that potion of yours could have – and does have – the two of you reproducing like rabbits."

"Don't remind me," Severus muttered gloomily. "I don't even want to think about having to go apologize to my Harry. I wonder where he is now."

"Probably your rooms – with four kids inside of him, I doubt he's going to have the energy to pull any death-defying stunts today. Or in the next nine months, for that matter."

"Thank Merlin," Severus breathed. "Maybe he should be pregnant more often."

Poppy chuckled. "You can go suggest that to him. I'm sure he would be very willing to tell you what he thought of that oh-so-lovely idea. You and the castle."

Severus nodded and sighed. "I'd better go find him before he _does_ manage to get himself into something incredibly… stupid."

Poppy laughed. "You go do that. By the way, how are Elena and Marcus Aurelius?"

Severus chuckled. "Always like you to call them by their full names. Harry and I usually shorten it to Marc, or sometimes even to, 'stupid baby.'"

Poppy rolled her eyes. "That's not good for the child's self-esteem."

"The kid gets enough boosters to last him a lifetime. Harry spoils both of them."

"As do you," Poppy added softly.

Severus nodded. "I never thought I'd say this, but I'm thrilled to have them. They're wonderful."

"I'm not sure you'll think that in a few years, but for now, enjoy your lives."

Severus smiled. "I'd better go," he said and left.

Harry was sitting in their rooms, staring absently at the fire.

"Harry?" Severus asked quietly.

"Honestly, next time you want to have a large family, do try to tell me _before_. I'd like to have _some _say in the decision making process. Two more kids and we'll have beaten the Weasleys."

"Now, obviously I certainly never wanted to surpass the Weasleys in procreation."

"We continue in this strain, we might end up having more kids than Molly will grandkids."

Severus shuddered.

"And next time you want to outdo the Weasleys in anything, tell me first, and I'll make sure I put you into a good support group."

Severus chuckled.

The nine months passed rather slowly. Harry, rather luckily, was in the middle of summer vacation when he went into labor.

"SHIT!" he screamed, dropping the vial in his hand. He had been helping Severus restock his cupboard.

Cleaning up the mess with a wave of his wand, Severus turned to Harry. "Are you okay?" he asked fearfully.

"Babies are coming," Harry panted.

"Right," Severus said matter-of-factly. "Breathe. Just breathe."

"And then I need Poppy," Harry snapped.

"Yes. But don't forget I've gone through this before."

Harry opened his mouth to deliver some wicked invective, but Severus shook his head. "Save your energy for the labor. You'll need it."

Within minutes, they were in the Infirmary, with Poppy bustling around Harry. "Severus!" she snapped. "I know you're worried, but I need room to help him!"

Severus stepped back, biting his nails worriedly.

A while later, Severus had no idea how long it was, all four were out, with an extremely exhausted Harry blinking groggily.

Severus smiled down at his young lover. "Four, like predicted."

"Good thing there were no unexpected ones. You never know with _your_ potion."

Severus rolled his eyes. "Names?"

"Genders?"

Severus chuckled. "Two and two. Two boy twins and two girl twins."

"Right. Let's start with the girls – you don't seem to have a need to name all of them after Romans."

Severus laughed. "Girls, then… Patricia?"

"Dear Merlin, NO!"

"Hyacinth?"

Harry smiled. "It's pretty. Sure. What about Serena?"

Severus nodded. "Yes. It's beautiful. Now, for guys. I'm thinking Adonis –"

"No. I'm not naming one of my kids after a bloody sex symbol."

Severus chuckled. "Good to know I can still get a rise out of you."

"Oh, anytime," Harry answered suggestively.

"Icarus?"

Harry shook his head.

"Trajan?"

Harry shook his head again.

"Caligula?"

"No! No one should be named after _him._"

Severus chuckled again. "You're right. Avidius Cassius?"

Harry pondered it for a moment. "It sounds cool. I don't know tht much Roman stuff. You go on."

"Saturninus Silvanus?"

"Can you possible conceive a nickname for that poor child?"

Severus shook his head. "Sargon Saturninus Silvanus?"

Harry shook his head, laughing. "Yes. But Sargon for short. Dear Merlin, Sev, if you want to give your kids names like this, what must your full name be?"

"Lucius Septimius Severus Alexander Caracalla Elagabalus Snape II," Severus rattled off proudly.

"Lucius Septimius Severus _what!"_

"Lucius Septimius Severus Alexander Caracalla Elagabalus Snape II."

"And exactly _how_ did your parents settle on Severus instead of, say, Lucius?"

"Lucius Septimius Severus comes from the ruler commonly known as Septimius Severus. The Severi were the line. Seems obvious. Severus Alexander ended the rule, Caracalla was one of the sons of Septimius Severus, and Elagabalus I'm not sure of."

Harry smiled suddenly. "Merlin, Harold James Potter sounds pretty boring compared to your name. Sev."

Severus smiled, and careful not to crush his kids, sat down next to Harry. He knew they'd end up having more kids, but for now, they were happy.

They were always happy in their own way.

Fin


End file.
